Friday, 22 May 2015

Worth?



Sometimes, I wonder if I’m really worthy.
Worthy for everything, worthy for anyone.
Am I worthy for someone fighting for me, or waiting for me, or simply care for me?
Because I don’t think I am.
I am just a pile of junk covered by flesh and skin, no more than that.
I don't have those shining-holy spirit in me, all I have is my swearing words, my insecurities and my low self-esteem.
I never know if people care for me, really care for me.
Sometimes, I think they never care about me but then I look back and see how much they put effort in me.
Maybe it's just me who’s too selfish for not seeing that.
Maybe that’s me who’s too self-centered for being a bitch that I want all attention I can get
Maybe it’s my fault that I have low self esteem, that I don’t have any value in me.
Or is it people that makes me feel this way?
People who constantly pushing, pressing, and ignoring me?
Or is it me who constantly pushing people away?
My fault or their fault?
Maybe I'm just depressed by default.